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Answers to Commonly Asked Questions
About Sympathy Flowers
The Society of American Florists answers the most commonly asked questions about sympathy flowers:
Is there a 'right' or 'wrong' type of arrangement to send as a sympathy gift?
There are a variety of appropriate options in sympathy flowers. Although very traditional sympathy arrangements are still requested, most florists today are happy to create a floral tribute that is original and creative. Mixed flower arrangements which look "just-picked-from-the-garden," or green or flowering plants are popular options. These more contemporary alternatives provide the family with the option to take them home, or deliver to hospitals or places of worship after the service.
Do some flower arrangements look too 'cheery' for a funeral?
Absolutely not. A funeral service is a way to honor someone's life, and bright, colorful flowers are a meaningful part of this tribute. In addition to adding beauty to an otherwise somber occasion, flowers provide a comforting diversion -- something to talk about or look at -- during the visitation.
Sometimes I see a charity mentioned 'in lieu of flowers' in the death notice. Is it still appropriate to send flowers?
Because flowers help you say what is often difficult to express, they are always appropriate and in good taste. Many people want to express sympathy and show respect for the deceased in a variety of ways, including charitable contributions, food donations, a helping hand, or cards and flowers. Flowers also play a functional role, adding warmth to the service and providing the visible, emotional support that the bereaved need during this time. Funeral directors agree that most people do not want a service completely devoid of flowers.
What can I do to make my arrangement special from the rest?
To make your floral tribute particularly special, ask your florist to create an arrangement that fits the deceased's personality. For example, a rustic basket of wildflowers to honor someone who loved the outdoors. You could also include his or her favorite flowers or colors, or a flower that had special significance in your relationship with that person. Whatever you do, the family is sure to notice and appreciate it.
I am part of a group. What are some suggestions?
When groups, including grandchildren, nieces and nephews, friends, neighbors, business associates, and clubs go in together on flowers, the arrangements can be very special and make a larger showing. Such pieces can include standing sprays and wreaths. When sending flowers as a group, include a contact name and address on the card so the family knows who to thank.
What is appropriate to send for a cremation?
A tastefully done floral tribute adds beauty to any type of service, whether it's a traditional burial or a cremation. Because cremation is increasingly common in some areas, many florists will have specific suggestions. Families may choose a piece designed for display with the urn, or an arrangement that can be enjoyed in the home after the service.
I found out about the death after the funeral was over.
What can I do?
A floral arrangement received at the home after the activity surrounding the funeral can be a comforting, welcome reminder that friends haven't forgotten. In fact, research shows that bereaved family and friends appreciate being thought of in the weeks or months after the funeral. A personal note or 'we are thinking of you' message with the flowers would be especially nice. Any support you can offer will let the family know you care.
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